MOODY

I KNOW I HAVEN'T WRITTEN IN AWHILE. HAVEN'T HAD MUCH TO SAY. WHICH IN A WAY IS BOTH A GOOD OR BAD THING. MY HEARTS JUST NOT IN IT. THERE ARE A LOT OF THINGS ON MY MIND.

I MISS SEAN, I CAN'T STOP THINKING ABOUT HIM. ITS TO A POINT NOW WHEN I DON'T THINK ABOUT HIM FOR A LIL WHILE AND THEN IT'LL HIT ME. AND IT HITS ME HARD, WHERE I JUST WANNA CRY. I MISS HIM......I KNOW IT HASN'T BEEN TOO LONG SINCE HE PASSED AND IT WILL TAKE TIME BUT I AM JUST NOT READY TO LET IT GO. I TRY TO ACT OK AROUND MY CO-WORKERS AND AROUND EDDIE. I DON'T WANT TO HAVE TO EXPLAIN MYSELF TO THEM WHEN THEY ASK THAT DREADED QUESTION. "WHATS A MATTER?" UGH....SAME SHIT THATS BEEN THE MATTER.

ON TOP OF THAT, I NEVER WANT TO DO ANY WORK ANYMORE. NEVER. I JUST DON'T WANT TO DO IT, AND THERE ARE DEADLINES I HAVE TO MEET. I WISH I KNEW WHAT THE HELL WAS WRONG WITH ME. I DIDN'T USED TO BE LIKE THIS. I USED TO BE A HARD WORKER AND I CARED ABOUT MY JOB. LATLEY I COULD CARE LESS. MAYBE I NEED A BREAK, A VACATION, SOMETHING BESIDES THIS DAMN ROUTINE.

WHATEVER, IM JUST MOODY. I PROMISE TO WRITE SOMETHING MORE INTERESTING NEXT TIME, I HAVE TONS OF THOUGHTS BUT NOTHING THAT I AM IN THE MOOD TO TALK ABOUT...SO...UNTIL NEXT TIME....